As I finish up Day 13 of the 21 Day Fix Extreme, I find myself constantly struggling with the words want and need. While I was growing up and gaining wisdom, I would consistently say, "Mom, I need x,y,z." I always hear her say, "Do you want it or do you need it?." In today's society we have basic needs and we have extravagant wants. I've become very conscious about if I truly want something versus if I need it. While I may want to stuff my face with ice cream, I really just need to keep eating my protein shakes.
Nutrition truly is the biggest factor in any equation to change your body. This program's nutrition is based on fueling your body and your workouts with whole, nutritious, and real food. I haven't had to change too many things about my eating habits (although I miss my quest bars and french vanilla coconut milk coffee creamer) and I absolutely LOVE the way my body performs. Since I'm following the Countdown to Competition plan this means Ive been experimenting with carb cycling in a way. I have to admit that I'm actually slightly enjoying that part. I know that I don't feel fueled to take on a long run but I feel incredibly fueled and empowered to tackle the 21 Day Fix Extreme workouts and whatever else factors into my day. I'm excited to see what my next chapter in my nutrition journey to find a balance.
I want a heaping spoonful of peanut butter. I want a burger and a bagel and pizza. I want wine and a margarita. I want to eat an entire bag of popcorn. I want all of the junk food that I usually treat myself with by following the 80% clean 20% dirty eating plan. I want to go for a run (this one might be a need). But despite all those wants, the want to finish this program feels so much greater. Sometimes my mind may argue on that point, but I've come this far and I can't give up now. I'm at a point where I already feel I am the smallest I've ever been. I feel and see my muscles popping in all of the right places. This is the time in the past where I slacked off and gotten lazy. I don't want to do that this time. I want to keep going and NOT stop. I want to see what can happen more than I want that peanut butter and everything else that is not in this careful portion controlled system. I want to stay committed to this program and not give up and give into the other wants that I know I feel and sometime confuse for needs. The want to stay committed helps give me the willpower to say no to all of the things I know I can portion back into my diet once these 3 weeks are over. I've luckily been able to prepare all of my food so far, but Mother's Day brunch this Sunday could prove to be quite a challenge. I'm slightly excited to see how closely I can keep to my normal eating routine.
Trusting the process is one of the hardest parts. Sometimes I wake up and feel that nothing has happened and there's no point so I might as well go get a spoonful of peanut butter. Results do not happen overnight and I find that I have to consistently remind myself of that fact. It's all about staying consistent and eating for the body I want and not the body I have. I know that everyone is built differently and my ideal body (a vain one at that) is probably not possible given my bone structure, but I still want to keep fighting to be the best me I can be. As it stands now, I've never felt more comfortable in my own skin. Autumn has a motivation quote before every workout and each one hits home. Last night on instagram she also posted a quote about just sweating and enjoying the process. I have to keep reminding myself of where I've started and how my dream body won't magically appear in 21 days. It's a stepping stone and a lifestyle change that will never end. I'm so grateful I still enjoy every step of the journey!
With an upcoming trip to visit my brother and see my friend complete her first Iron(wo)man in Houston at the end of next week I know that all of my wants will become reality and they will be even more satisfying if I don't give up now.